The first question we ask after self-identifying we are autistic and/or neurodivergent is, "What is stimming?" We may see stimming talked about in the autism and neurodivergent spaces on social media. Others gush about their favorite stim toys and what their stims are. It helps us learn more about ourselves after we self-identify or get professionally diagnosed.

If you have known you are autistic and neurodivergent for a long time now, you may wonder what your stims might be. There are plenty of stims we do without realizing it. For years, I've scratched my chest and picked at my collarbone, and I never realized I was doing it. 

After I got some stim necklaces from my online store, I noticed how much I fidgeted with my necklace. It prevented the chest scratching, an unhealthy stim I needed to stop. I scratched until my skin bled, so preventing this was important to me.

My education about stimming started with that. I wanted to help us find the perfect stim products for us. Something that would help improve our stimming experience like the necklaces helped me. 

Most stim toy stores focused on selling fidget toys for children instead of adults, so I built a store made for us. The Autistic Innovator's mission is to help autistic and neurodivergent people stim around the world.

Let's get into the good stuff.

Why Do I Stim?

Stimming can be a way to self-soothe when the environment around us is overwhelming. We can also stim because it gives us autistic and neurodivergent joy. Different for everyone, we can stim for many reasons, varying from one moment to the next. 

We may know the feeling of every sound overwhelming us. Our sense of touch could become overwhelmed by the sensation of a tap on the shoulder or a surprise hug. The sensation of tags on our clothing or fabrics we wear can make us itch and squirm for hours. It makes us feel like we want to crawl out of our skin to escape the awful feeling.

Everyone is different and has different sensitivities. We can start feeling like we will jump out of our skin, our hearts beat fast, and we want to run away. Stimming helps us express some of this anxious energy to handle our situation better. We can also be sensory seeking and use stimming to increase our sensory input to calm ourselves. We will get into what sensory seeking means further into this article.

Stimming can also help us feel happier and more joyful. You may have heard the term 'autistic joy' and 'neurodivergent joy'. It describes those moments when we have so much joy over things that are especially unique to the way our sensory systems are wired. We may deep dive into our special interests, and that may bring us joy. We could also find our moments of happiness with our natural healthy stims.

How Do You Know If You are Stimming?

The signs you are stimming can vary between each person. We autistics are all different in what our natural stims may be, along with some we may have in common too. You can figure out if you are stimming by paying close attention to yourself throughout your day. 

Do you often chew on your clothing or objects around you? You could have a chew stim. How do you react when you feel you want to run away from an overwhelming situation? Asking yourself questions like these can help provide a clue as to who you are.

There are many subconscious stims we may do without realizing it. You might not be the same as me with a chest scratching stim, but you could have other stims you might not be aware of. Things like:

• Pacing

• Bouncing your legs while sitting down

• Tapping your pencil on a table

• Chewing on your pens

• Chewing on straws

• Repeating the same word or phrase in your thoughts or speaking out loud

• Playing with your hair

• Spinning your rings around your finger

• Fidgeting with your necklace and earrings

This list could go on, and we will dive deep into types of stims further down this article.

Is Stimming Always Related to Autism?

This is a good question. Stimming can also occur in people with anxiety and ADHD. According to John Ratey, MD in his book Spark, physical activity and fidgeting increase levels of dopamine and norepinephrine in the brain. These neurotransmitters help sharpen your focus and increase attention.

Fidget toys, also known as stim toys, allow someone with anxiety and ADHD to relieve their excess energy. Spinner rings are the most common choice. The rings are wearable and allow someone to spin the top part of the ring around while the bottom part of the ring stays in place. It spins on a track in a way.

One of my favorite stim toys I find the most calming is the acupressure rings. They have a thicker texture and the rings are made from wire that allows you to roll them up and down your fingers to stay calm. If I'm really anxious, I will move the ring around multiple fingers and move it up and down each finger. 

I have fidgeted with them while on video calls with friends, Zoom therapy appointments, and when I get lost in my anxious thoughts. I can focus better when rolling the rings up and down my finger while I'm thinking or talking. These can also be great for people who have anxiety and ADHD.

Fidget toys aren't the only way a person with anxiety and ADHD can stim. Sometimes things such as using colored pencils to color the pages of a coloring book can also help to distract someone with anxiety. There are other ways to stim such as playing with everyday objects, using colored lights at home, and even eating or drinking can be a taste stim.

Can You Be Autistic & Neurodivergent and Not Stim?

Not every autistic person needs to stim, relieve anxious energy and is content with sitting still. While this can be more uncommon, every person is different and not all of us fit the average autistic and neurodivergent traits. There is nothing wrong with an autistic and neurodivergent person who doesn't need to stim every day and we should count it as a normal trait.

Stimming and stim are short for sensory stimulation. You can be sensory avoidant, sensory seeking, or both. Stimming to either reduce sensory exposure or increase it are both ways to stim.

You may not have a need for these types of stims, and content without fidgeting, even if you are autistic and neurodivergent.

Types of Stims

As autistic adults, we can stim with sight, taste, touch, smell, hearing, and speaking. The most common stims are repetitive stimming behaviors and stimming with sound. There are dozens of ways to stim, and we will dive deep into as many of these stims as possible.

Subconscious stims

We've talked about the subconscious stims earlier. You can subconsciously do any of the following stims in this chapter or something not on this list. Especially for the newly self-identified who are new to the world of stimming, you may not be aware of which stims you are doing naturally. Not every stim on this list will resonate with you, but you may relate to at least a few of them.

Fidgeting with Hands and Objects

This one is the most obvious type of stimming. We all know about fidget toys and everything I've mentioned so far, but there are smaller ones you may not realize. 

One of my subconscious stims is when I'm at a restaurant. They give you the straw inside a wrapper for your drink, and I usually take the wrapper off, crunch it up into a ball, and fidget with the straw ball. I'll unravel it, crunch it back up, unravel it again repeatedly while talking and waiting for my food, or I will move it around on the table. Our subconscious stims can be something small like this.

You could also fidget with your hands themselves. Gripping your hands, rubbing your fingers, rubbing your hands together, popping your knuckles are other ways we could stim if we don't have an object to stim with. When we fidget with our hands or objects, we feel we must constantly keep our hands busy so we can sit still, concentrate, or burn off excess energy.

Fidgeting with Clothing

If we are wearing long sleeves, we may pull at the bottom of the sleeves. We could stretch it over our hands, rub the seams, and pull at the sleeves. We may also grab onto the bottom of our shirts and stretch them out by lifting the shirt, wrapping it around our arms, and pulling on it.

Adjusting your clothing throughout the day can also be a stim. When we wear something that overwhelms us without realizing it, we may readjust our pants, pull on our belt loops, move the straps on tank tops, or readjust our shirts in a repetitive motion. If we have a wide-neck shirt, we may readjust it by moving and positioning it around our shoulders.

If you wear a hoodie with a zipper, you may zip it up and move it up and down in a repetitive motion. Zipping and unzipping the hoodie to hear the satisfying sound allows us to fidget with something we are wearing. Some of us may have, myself included, broken the zipper from doing this too much. There are zipper fidget bracelets here that can provide a way to fidget without risking breaking the zipper on our clothing.

Zippers on hoodies aren't the only part of a hoodie that is great for stimming. We may also play with the string in the hood. We may pull on it, chew on it, bite it, twirl it around our fingers, and pull on it. We could also put the hood over our heads and pull on the strings. Stretch it out, pull on the strings to make it tighter again, loosen it, and doing this repeatedly can also be a way to stim with clothing.

Chewing on the collar of our shirts is also a very common way to fidget with clothing. Depending on how hard we chew, it can be anywhere from a harmless stim, to causing damage to our clothing.

Eating and Drinking

We often wouldn't assume eating and drinking can be a stim instead of simply eating too much, but it can be a way to soothe us. 

It is well known that food and drinks can psychologically affect us and release the happy serotonin brain chemicals, but the taste can also be a stim. The texture, taste, or physical act of eating or drinking can provide a stimming experience when we consume these foods or drinks.

You could have one taste you prefer over all others and may consume it as a repetitive activity. I bring this up because it is one of my stims. Consuming sugar is one of my stims. I love to drink many types of sweet drinks, and eat candy, and other sugary foods. Carbonated sweet drinks is my biggest stim. The feeling of the carbonation while drinking is very satisfying to me. 

It has a calming effect on me to drink or eat something sweet, and not artificial sweeteners either, it has to be made with real sugar. Drinking and eating sugary foods all day long is not good for me, especially with how rapidly I can consume them, but it is a hard stim to break.

Chewing

One of the most well-known stims in our community is the chew stim. We may subconsciously stim by chewing and not realize it. For example, when we are out at a restaurant, we may chew on the straw while waiting for our food and have to ask for a new straw because we've chewed it up so much that we can't drink from it anymore.

We could also chew on our hoodie strings, clothing, pen caps, and anything else we have around us that's easy to chew on and satisfying. Chewing on ice is another common stim. We may like the cold crunching sensation as we chew on the ice pieces.

Binge eating could also be related to chewing stims. If you notice you chew on objects all day long or bite on them in addition to eating often, it could be that binge eating is a way to get the chew stimming experience you need throughout the day.

There are many chew necklaces out there we can use to chew stim that is durable and easier on our teeth. They are made from silicone and are more gentle for our teeth than chewing on something like pen caps. 

We don't always have to chew on them. Sometimes having the necklace pendant to bite on and leave in your mouth can also be another way to stim. Chew stimming can be a satisfying experience for those who need to release their sensory anxiety through chewing or biting.

Repetitive motions

Some of the most common stims are repetitive motions. We can do any stim type in this article repetitively. It is when we repeat the same action, again and again, to release anxious energy when we feel overwhelmed or to prevent us from becoming overwhelmed. These types of motions can become soothing to our overloaded sensory system.

Hand Flapping

Hand flapping is a common way to stim for autistic people. If you like to wave your hands around, up and down, or wave motions, you could be stimming by hand flapping. The arms can be bent, extended, or joined in on the flapping fun.

Unfortunately, many adults will tell children, teens, or other autistic adults to stop the 'behavior' because they don't understand how much it brings you joy to stim this way. There's nothing wrong with hand flapping if it helps you feel better.

Visual stimming

When it storms, snows, or rains outside, we may enjoy looking out the window and watching the rain or snow fall as a visual stim. We can also enjoy looking at colored lights, and lights with colorful swirling patterns as a way to stim. Anything we find mesmerizing to watch could be a visual stim.

Humming

Humming song melodies we enjoy can be a way to stim. We may enjoy the sound and feeling humming gives us.

Singing

We may sing and create songs about everything we are doing and seeing in the moment as a way to stim. It's a way of narrating what we are doing. We may also sing our favorite songs as a way to stim.

Whistling

The sound and sensory feeling of whistling may be a way for us to stim.

Talking to yourself

You may work out your thoughts and emotions by talking out loud to yourself. We may also talk to ourselves by narrating what we are doing in the moment. You may talk to yourself when you are with people and/or alone. It can also be a way to make sense of your emotions and thoughts.

Repeating words or phrases

This is most commonly known as echolalia. We may say a phrase or word out loud on repeat. It can be something we heard on a TV show or movie that we are repeating, or just a word we enjoy saying.

Repeating words or phrases in your thoughts instead of saying them out loud can also be a stim.

Twirling

The repetitive motions of twirling can be something that soothes us. We may twist ourselves side to side, sort of like a half twirl, or spin ourselves all the way around as a stim.

Rocking

Rocking back and forth can be a common autistic stim. When we get overwhelmed, we may be soothed by the repetitive motion of rocking.

Pacing

Pacing while we talk to someone on the phone or while we talk to ourselves can also be a stim. Walking around may help us focus on what the person we are talking to on the phone is saying. It can also help us sort our thoughts.

We may also pace simply because we enjoy this way of stimming.

Fidgeting with hair

Putting our hair behind our ears and stroking our hair can also be a stim. Running our hands through our loved one's hair because we enjoy the feeling of how soft their hair can be is a stim too. Many people enjoy this feeling and find it to be calming, much to our stimming delight.

Pulling or chewing on hair

This can be a stressful stim because we are losing hair from pulling it out or chewing on it. Many find the right stim toys for them to redirect the pulling and chewing on their hair, which can help keep their hands busy. There isn't a stim toy for me to recommend that by default helps everyone who is stimming by pulling out their hair, but some find ones that are helpful for them.

Nose picking

The sensory feeling inside our nose may cause discomfort, which can cause one to pick at it repeatedly. This can often lead to nosebleeds when it becomes excessive.

Nose rubbing

Rubbing our noses can be a stim and something we do when anxious. This can lead to red noses and the skin feeling raw with excessive rubbing.

Tapping on tables or objects

Tapping on a table or object, especially when creating a rhythm, can be a soothing stim for us. Perhaps we love music and it’s a way to drum the melody we’ve got in our minds.

Skin scratching or rubbing (face, lips, arms, hands, legs, etc.)

With excessive skin scratching, this can cause red skin, bleeding, and raw skin. We may do this unaware we are scratching. The rough texture or feeling of scratching from our nails may feel soothing to us, even if it causes discomfort. If we are sensory seeking, the scratchy feeling may be soothing to us.

Other people may also point out a natural scratching behavior you are doing. In my case, everyone would ask out of concern why my chest and neck were so red. They thought I had a big rash or skin condition because my skin was peeling. When I didn't have an explanation, they told me to go see a doctor or dermatologist. It was from stimming by scratching. I didn't know I was autistic, nor did I know what stimming was, so I was oblivious to what I was doing to my skin.

After I began selling all the autistic and neurodivergent t-shirts in my store, I made them a regular part of my wardrobe to cover my chest and collarbone. If my skin isn’t covered I’ll pick and scratch until it bleeds and scars. I’ve also used some of the fidget necklaces I sell in my store to fidget with so I won’t scratch during the summer when tank tops are a regular part of my wardrobe. I’ve also used chew necklaces to release energy and hold on to the pendant with one of my hands while I chew, which helps a lot too.

Skin picking (lips, arms)

Picking and peeling the skin off our lips can be a stim and lead to some scarring. Some people pick the skin on their arms, which can also become uncomfortable when done excessively.

Some customers have found chew necklaces to be very helpful with biting, chewing, peeling, and picking at their lips. If the right fidget toy is found that can give both hands something to do, it can distract from needing to pick at the lips and arms, and provide a better energy release.

Nail biting

Nail biting is a very common stim. We may bite at our nails, or chew on them when they are long, and despite efforts to keep the nails short so this cannot be done, the need to release that chewing energy can be strong. Whether or not this turns into an unhealthy stim depends on how often it is done.

This goes back to the chew necklaces as well. Some customers have found them very helpful because the need to chew can be very strong, and chew necklace pendants can withstand larger amounts of chewing, depending on the chew necklace. There are a lot available, so it just depends on which one is best for your chewing needs.

Grinding teeth

Grinding our teeth and clenching our jaws can be a stim we may not realize we are doing. If done excessively this can hurt our teeth, and cause our jaw to pop and make crackling sounds when chewing.

This is another one I know from personal experience. I have jaw tremors that never go away, so once that started I began clenching my jaw and grinding my teeth subconsciously so I don’t feel the tremors. Unfortunately this is not a healthy stim for me, but not doing it is very uncomfortable.

I’m going to sound like a proverbial broken record here with the chew necklaces again, but I’ve found the Prism Pendant Chew Necklace to be really helpful with the teeth grinding. It’s made of silicone and very durable, and a slimmer thin pendant that can be used with one side of the mouth, so I’ll often bite on the pendant and hold it in between my teeth. Doing this allows me to grind my teeth on the silicone pendant, while also causing my jaw to not clench together. An extra benefit is that I don’t feel the jaw tremors with it either.

What are the Benefits of Stimming?

When stimming is directed into something that is both healthy and soothing, such as the tapping drum rhythms on tables and objects we talked about earlier, then it can be a great way to release anxiety and energy.

It may not be the same for you, but stimming for me personally is a huge energy release. The repetitive motions are what I find the most soothing. I’ve got numerous fidget toys I keep on my desk to use while I’m working in my home office. The Fidget Cube Spinner is one I often fidget with. I’ve got the rainbow colored one, so the colors are pretty while it spins, giving me the visual stim.

My cat Sam enjoys the big desk spinners. He will spin it with his paw and stare mesmerized at the swirling patterns that it makes. He uses it every time he sits on my lap while I’m at my desk. Even cats like stim toys!

When we have something that we find soothing, and that can withstand all our stimming and fidgeting energy, and that isn’t harmful, it can help us significantly.

How Can I Stim & What Can I Stim With?

Many of us autistics and neurodivergent folks of all ages enjoy the repetitive motions stimming provides. It can be a lot of fun to do too!

Some of the healthier stims like humming, singing, twirling, chewing, among others we’ve talked about, can be a great and free way to stim and fidget.

If you’d like a fidgeting tool, there are a lot of fidgeting options here in The Autistic Innovator. Fidgets start as low as $8.95 USD in the fidget toys collection. There’s also the luxury fidget toys, if you’d like to spend a little more for a beautiful one-of-a-kind fidget.

The fidgets that are right for one person may not be right for another. We all have different fidgeting needs. Finding the right fidget for you depends on your natural stims, and whether or not you want to redirect that stim into something else.

Why Should I Stim?

Stimming can be a very helpful energy release. Anxiety can cause a lot of built up energy, and we may or may not have a way to channel this energy into something.

Especially if we begin to go into sensory overload, the stimming can work as a neutralizing force to help us get through the overwhelming situation we are stuck in.

When you are sensory avoidant, you try to avoid anything that can cause you sensory overload. It also means you become overwhelmed by too much sensory input.

Sensory seeking means you aren't getting enough sensory stimulation and need more. 

People who seek more sensory input may love roller coasters, rough textures, loud music at concerts, and anything that is intense sensory exposure. Where sensory-avoidant people prefer to reduce sensory exposure, those who are sensory seeking need more of it. Autistic and neurodivergent people can also be both sensory avoidant and sensory seeking.

How Do I Learn to Stim?

You might already have stims you engage in naturally. Fidgeting is something that is very common, and we might not realize that it’s a stim. Which means we may be doing something we find soothing without realizing that’s what we are doing and why.

Hopefully everything we’ve talked about here gives you a glimpse or understanding of how you naturally self-soothe.

Unmasking & Stimming

Our first thought with stimming may be, “What will people think of me?” We may have been bullied by kids at school, teachers, parents, or any others who tell us to stop with an annoyed tone. This can make us feel shame over something that is not our fault.

This is the main reason why I created this store, The Autistic Innovator. So many of us autistics and neurodivergent people are very self-conscious about our ways of stimming and self-soothing. 

Fidget toys have become socially acceptable over the years. Many neurotypicals have bought fidgets from me, and told me they aren’t autistic or neurodivergent, but they just really like the fidget toys, especially the luxury ones, and the spinner rings are intriguing to them. They might also play with their wedding rings, and find spinner rings to be a lot more fun to fidget with.

Coloring books for adults have also become a lot more popular over the years, and people of all neurotypes enjoy them.

Having access to fidgets that are more 'socially acceptable' can help us reduce the amount of awkwardness we might feel about stimming in public.

Even if we wait until we get home to do things like hand flapping, humming, repeating words out loud, and more, we can find comfort in getting to do those things in our safe space at home by ourselves.

Unmasking and stimming go together in a lot of ways, and is often the first place we begin when we want to learn to unmask.

Self-Acceptance & Stimming

Sometimes the hardest part for us in learning how to stim and embracing our need to stim is self-acceptance. It is important to learn to become okay with who we are and to not shame ourselves. If we’ve been told our stimming is bad, then we may have internalized that and it caused us to feel bad about ourselves.

One way to start is to learn self-appreciation for who we are. This includes embracing our natural stims. Our fidgeting is a part of us, and a part of our autistic and neurodivergent nature, so it can be something we need in our daily lives.

Conclusion

I hope this article has been helpful for you. Maybe you learned something new about yourself.

Remember to do your best to embrace who you are, find self-acceptance, and appreciate who you are. We can be our own biggest critic, and it’s a journey ahead finding ways to learn to feel better about ourselves and our stimming.